Dawn's Notes
Richard's Treasures - February 2017
by Dawn Phelps, RN/LMSW
There were only a few things that he really treasured. When he died, he left behind few personal possessions—so few they can be counted on one hand. I’m referring to my brother-in-law Richard who lived in Lexington, Kentucky, until his death in 2015 at the age of 78 following a stroke.
His first treasure was his faith—he loved God. Before he became ill, he attended church faithfully.
His second treasure was his wife, my sister Joy, and he made sure her needs were met. They owned a large beautiful two-story antebellum house with tall columns. But that house was her thing—I think he would have been content with a lesser house.
There were a few things that Richard enjoyed. His work—he owned a construction company. Many evenings he stretched blueprints out over their kitchen table after supper and worked into the night.
He loved music—concerts, singing, and playing his trombone. He played trombone in his high school band and in church as an adult. He had a rich baritone voice and sang in church.
He enjoyed growing tomatoes and caring for the flowers in their back yard. So his life was relatively simple. He loved God, his wife Joy, his work, music, and his backyard. He marveled at what God had made—mountains, trees, and animals. As a young boy, he enjoyed going hunting with his dog and his rifle in Tennessee.
After Richard’s death, my sister Joy remarked to me about how few possessions Richard had. He had a couple of good suits, some slacks and shirts. His favorite shirts were well worn. My sister gave Richard’s clothes
to two of his nephews David and Jonathan in Alaska who could wear them.
Before his death, Richard gave away his boyhood treasures. He gave his rifle to David who loves to hunt. He gave his trombone to my oldest grandson Sam who loves music. So the only earthly treasure that Richard left for my sister Joy was his Bible.
Think about it. Richard was a master-builder who built hospitals, schools, and many of the buildings on the University of Kentucky campus. He had money to buy anything he wanted, yet he collected few personal possessions of his own.
When he died, he left my sister financially sound—he took good care of one of his main treasures—Joy—during their married years and afterward! And he never quit loving God. Ultimately, his earthly treasures had to be left behind.
What are your treasures—people, family, friends, money, or things? We all have different things that we value during our lifetime. If your “treasure,” like Richard, has passed on, the valentine decorations in the stores during February may be vivid reminders of your loss.
Even though your loved one is gone from this earth, love continues—your relationship has not ended. Your “treasure” is waiting for you. So for now, cherish your memories and take care of your heart.
“Death leaves a memory no one can heal, love leaves a memory no one can steal.” - From a tombstone in Ireland
Call about the next "Living Life after Loss" Group at:
Meadowlark Hospice 709 Liberty Clay Center, Kansas
(785) 632-2225
Dawn Phelps, RN/LMSW, Group Facilitator