Dawn's Notes
Butterflies, Dragonflies, and My Dear Friend Leah - September 2020
by Dawn Phelps, RN/LMSW
The first time I encountered a mass migration of dragonflies was when I was driving home from Salina, Kansas, one evening, several years ago. I was heading north, and the dragonflies were heading south. Thousands of those beautiful iridescent-winged creatures were on the move, and I cringed every time one smashed into my windshield. I slowed down, but I still could not dodge them all.
The second time I saw thousands of dragonflies on the move was one Saturday a few years ago when my husband Tom and I attended my niece’s wedding. Just as we were leaving the reception, the air around us was once again filled with a dense, moving sea of migrating dragonflies. When I saw those beautiful creatures dancing through the air that evening, I recalled my memories of dragonflies when I was a young child. We called them “snake doctors.” I always wondered “Where is the snake?” I deliberately looked for, but never saw, a snake on the creek bank when the “snake doctors” were hovering over the stream. After my niece’s reception, I did some reading about dragonflies. I found out there is a Welsh myth that dragonflies are “snake servants,” that they follow snakes and stitch up their wounds! (Maybe that’s where the name snake doctor came from!)
The migration routes of dragonflies have not been studied as much as one might think, but there are some things that are known. There are about 5,000 species worldwide. The colors of their bodies may vary, but their four wings are usually see-through. They have very large bulging eyes which give them terrific vision, and they are also one of the fastest insects—flying 30-60 miles per hour. One of the most fascinating things about dragonflies is that their four wings can operate together or independently of each other, two at a time or just one wing, allowing them to hover, fly backwards, roll in the air, or make tight turns—sounds like fun! God must have had a sense of humor when he designed those wings! Dragonflies usually migrate in August and September, flying one day, resting a couple of days. They generally do not fly if the wind is blowing too hard, and they seem to rely on a north wind to help them fly southward.
My third and most profound experience with dragonflies occurred on June 14, 2016, the day of my dear friend Leah’s funeral. She and I had been friends since 1983, a long-term friendship filled with good and bad times, including the deaths of her husband and mine. About a year and one-half before her death, Leah experienced some bewildering symptoms and slowly lost her ability to swallow. She was diagnosed with ALS and eventually was unable to walk or care for herself. She died on June 10, 2016, while my husband Tom and I were away on a trip. We returned home in time for her funeral which was on June 14. After the funeral we went to the cemetery for the service. During the prayer, two dragonflies danced through the tent, and a butterfly landed on the casket.
After everyone else had left the cemetery, my husband Tom and I stayed; I was reluctant to leave. While we stood in silence outside the tent, I thought about our years of friendship and her brave struggle with ALS which robbed her earthly body of so much. Movement in the air caught my eye. A couple of butterflies flew around outside the tent. A dragonfly flew under the tent and lit on the brass post of the rectangular frame that held the casket. The dragonfly just calmly sat there for several seconds while a beautiful butterfly flitted slowly through one side of the tent and out the other. How amazing! Anyone who knew Leah knew she loved both butterflies and dragonflies. She decorated her home with photos and metal cutouts of both. Their presence was reassuring.
I believe that they were Leah’s hello from Heaven, her way of letting me know that all was well, that she was no longer bound by ALS. She could move; she was free, and her spirit was flying! Leah was only 71 when she died. But in her 71 years she made a profound difference in many young lives as a special education teacher. Like the two beautiful creatures of nature, Leah added joy and beauty to this world. And when God called her, she had flown! Leah has been gone for a few years now, and I still miss her. But when I see a butterfly or dragonfly, I think of her, about my memories and our friendship, and my dear friend Leah.
“When someone you love becomes a memory, the memory becomes a treasure.” - Author Unknown
Call about the next "Living Life after Loss" Group at:
Meadowlark Hospice
709 Liberty, Clay Center, Kansas
(785) 632-2225
Dawn Phelps, RN/LMSW, Group Facilitator